Evil children. 

Evil children.

My grandparents had a summerhouse that they had built themselves. I loved to be there.
I vividly remember that me and my cousin constantly had fights about everything and that no matter how angry I got I couldn't hit her. She and her little brother has this disease when the blood doesn't coagulate. This made me even more frustrated so one day I threw a plastic water container on her head. She screamed and she screamed and I knew she was just faking it, because it didn't threw it that hard at all. Now, I don't know anymore, she could have gotten real hurt. But we always became friends again, until next fight.
My grandmother was more than patient with us, we were like two evil hurricanes there every summer. One time, at my cousins grandparents summerhouse we were told to take our 6 years younger cousin with us when were going for a walk. We did not want to take her with us. She must have been about three years old then and we about nine or ten. We took her into the forest and helped her to climb up a big rock that she couldn't come down from, then we left her there, went back to the house and said that we had lost her. They got very angry with us and we had to go back and get her. The poor little girl was so afraid. She tried to pretend it didn't matter, because she wanted to be tough like the big girls, like us. But we weren't tough, we were just stupid and mean. We were of course damaged by bad parenting, and hadn't developed empathy as much as is considered normal and we also triggered eachother to be tougher than the other.
I looked up to her and she looked up to me. So it is today too, but now we encourage eachother to be good loving human beings instead. I hope our little cousin will forgive us someday. I have apologized many times, but I still feel guilty.

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